The Stream: Not scary and the acting is subpar.

The Big Screen: Can’t think of anything.

The Final Bill: Very unscary vampire movie.

– S2S: Movie Review
Director: Gary Dauberman
Writers: Stephen King, Gary Dauberman
Stars: Lewis Pullman, Makenzie Leigh, Jordan Preston Carter
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Rating: R for bloody violence and language
Runtime: 1 hour 47 minutes
Production Companies: New Line Cinema, Atomic Monster, Vertigo Entertainment
Platform: Released on Max October 3, 2024
Coming Soon to Max: Roller Jam, Louder: the soundtrack of change, Breath of Fire, Skin Hunters, Dune: Prophecy (Tv show)

Welcome back, Streamers! It’s that time of year where our blood-challenged and leading friends come to play.   Recently, a remake of Stephen King’s Salem’s Lot premiered on Max, formerly known as HBO Max.  This Salem’s Lot follows an author who returns to his hometown in search of literary inspiration but instead finds that vampires are taking over his town. Blood sucking hijinks ensue.

First, since it is prominently mentioned on the poster, this movie is from the creator of The Conjuring.  I say that because like the first film of that horror franchise, this movie does a pretty good job of doing horror without being over-the-top gory or raunchy.  Unfortunately for this movie, that actually made this movie pretty boring or not scary. These are some of the least scary vampires since Twilight, except the main vampire. Also, this movie has to contend with the ghosts of previous versions and those had to be scarier than this without even seeing them all. On top of that, the cast is quite forgettable.  Even the notable names in the cast must have only signed up for a paycheck with this one. Nevertheless, the film itself looks pretty good, but that doesn’t save it from all the other mediocrity.

Long story short, this remake of Salem’s Lot looks nice but is just as boring as it wants to be. Nothing makes this movie new or interesting to watch other than it is just well made from the creator of The Conjuring. Grab a handful of popcorn and watch this when there’s not much else available or you want something not so scary to watch.